To some people.. SEX is taboo... not be said out loud.. it is too embarassing to talk about.. however, I think it is a good subject to be discussed amongst us all.. I have below, an article about sex after the baby... most mothers want to know more but shy to ask around, even asking the O&G. Hopefully with the article below, we can all learn a thing or two :) have fun reading...
Will I ever want sex again?
With a new baby to care for round the clock, sex may seem like a fond but distant memory. In the first six weeks after delivery, you're exhausted and sore and overwhelmed. If you had perineal tearing or stitches from an episiotomy, you may feel like you'll never want to have sex again. Try not to worry too much about it and give yourself a break. The fact that you're reading this article is a good indication that somewhere inside you is the desire to make love again. But there's no need to rush into having sex until you feel ready. Rest assured, you and your partner will be ready to rumble again soon.
How can I keep my low libido from destroying my relationship?
"The postpartum period, before you actually start having sex again, is a great time to work on communication skills," says Lisa Douglass, an expert in human sexuality at the University of Chicago. "As you accommodate the new person in your family, you also need to renew your own relationship. That means talking about your needs and listening to your partner's," she says.
When is it normal to resume sex after giving birth?
According to a recent study sponsored by the National Institute of Mental Health, 90 percent of couples have sex within a year of having a baby. But don't let that statistic alarm you! On average, couples resumed intercourse seven weeks after the baby's arrival. Women who had cesarean sections had intercourse slightly sooner than those who'd given birth vaginally.
I want affection, but not sex. Is there something wrong with me?
Nothing is wrong with you. Many women feel the same way. "A woman wants to know that her partner is attracted to her outside the bedroom as well as in it," says Gilda Carle, Ph.D., a relationship expert in Yonkers, New York. One way to encourage your partner to be affectionate with you is to reinforce the behaviors you like, by saying things like, "I love it when you stroke my hair." Or, "When we hold hands and kiss while we're watching television, I realize you love me even though I'm not ready for sex." You might also ask for nonsexual massages or foot rubs. Your partner should know that you appreciate his touch outside of lovemaking, and that a kiss on the back of your neck while you're tending to your baby sends shivers (the good kind) down your spine.
Can my partner and I touch each other sexually even though I'm not quite up for intercourse?
"Yes! Now is the perfect time to re-explore manual sex," says Douglass. Think back to the time when you did "everything but" have intercourse. It was exciting then, and it can be just as fun now. "Touching each other intimately gives Mom time to heal from giving birth, and the orgasms from this kind of stimulation will help her feel like a sexual being again," she says. It's a great way to have sex contribute to, rather than take away from your recovery. Douglass points out that, "the orgasms may even give you both the extra energy you need for those first grueling, wonderful months of a new baby's life."
I think I'm ready for sex, but I'm worried about the pain. And what if my breasts leak?
When you think the moment is right, go for it. But take it slow and easy, and keep your sense of humor. The best time is after you've fed your baby and he's likely to sleep for at least an hour. That way you won't feel rushed through lovemaking. Using a lubricant (usually found near the condoms or the tampons and sanitary pads in the drug store) should reduce any discomfort you might feel from vaginal dryness. But you should also let your partner know what feels good and what doesn't as you're going along.
If you're breastfeeding, you may worry that your breasts will leak at an inconvenient time — and they might. During climax, some women discover that they experience letdown (their breasts leak or spray milk). That's because the hormones that are present during orgasm are also present during letdown. There's really nothing you can do about it except laugh it off and clean it up. As time goes on you probably won't have as much of a problem because the letdown reflex lessens as breastfeeding becomes more established. Keep a towel nearby and remember that this, too, will pass. With time, sex will likely be as satisfying, if not more, as it was before your baby came along.
Will I ever want sex again?
With a new baby to care for round the clock, sex may seem like a fond but distant memory. In the first six weeks after delivery, you're exhausted and sore and overwhelmed. If you had perineal tearing or stitches from an episiotomy, you may feel like you'll never want to have sex again. Try not to worry too much about it and give yourself a break. The fact that you're reading this article is a good indication that somewhere inside you is the desire to make love again. But there's no need to rush into having sex until you feel ready. Rest assured, you and your partner will be ready to rumble again soon.
How can I keep my low libido from destroying my relationship?
"The postpartum period, before you actually start having sex again, is a great time to work on communication skills," says Lisa Douglass, an expert in human sexuality at the University of Chicago. "As you accommodate the new person in your family, you also need to renew your own relationship. That means talking about your needs and listening to your partner's," she says.
When is it normal to resume sex after giving birth?
According to a recent study sponsored by the National Institute of Mental Health, 90 percent of couples have sex within a year of having a baby. But don't let that statistic alarm you! On average, couples resumed intercourse seven weeks after the baby's arrival. Women who had cesarean sections had intercourse slightly sooner than those who'd given birth vaginally.
I want affection, but not sex. Is there something wrong with me?
Nothing is wrong with you. Many women feel the same way. "A woman wants to know that her partner is attracted to her outside the bedroom as well as in it," says Gilda Carle, Ph.D., a relationship expert in Yonkers, New York. One way to encourage your partner to be affectionate with you is to reinforce the behaviors you like, by saying things like, "I love it when you stroke my hair." Or, "When we hold hands and kiss while we're watching television, I realize you love me even though I'm not ready for sex." You might also ask for nonsexual massages or foot rubs. Your partner should know that you appreciate his touch outside of lovemaking, and that a kiss on the back of your neck while you're tending to your baby sends shivers (the good kind) down your spine.
Can my partner and I touch each other sexually even though I'm not quite up for intercourse?
"Yes! Now is the perfect time to re-explore manual sex," says Douglass. Think back to the time when you did "everything but" have intercourse. It was exciting then, and it can be just as fun now. "Touching each other intimately gives Mom time to heal from giving birth, and the orgasms from this kind of stimulation will help her feel like a sexual being again," she says. It's a great way to have sex contribute to, rather than take away from your recovery. Douglass points out that, "the orgasms may even give you both the extra energy you need for those first grueling, wonderful months of a new baby's life."
I think I'm ready for sex, but I'm worried about the pain. And what if my breasts leak?
When you think the moment is right, go for it. But take it slow and easy, and keep your sense of humor. The best time is after you've fed your baby and he's likely to sleep for at least an hour. That way you won't feel rushed through lovemaking. Using a lubricant (usually found near the condoms or the tampons and sanitary pads in the drug store) should reduce any discomfort you might feel from vaginal dryness. But you should also let your partner know what feels good and what doesn't as you're going along.
If you're breastfeeding, you may worry that your breasts will leak at an inconvenient time — and they might. During climax, some women discover that they experience letdown (their breasts leak or spray milk). That's because the hormones that are present during orgasm are also present during letdown. There's really nothing you can do about it except laugh it off and clean it up. As time goes on you probably won't have as much of a problem because the letdown reflex lessens as breastfeeding becomes more established. Keep a towel nearby and remember that this, too, will pass. With time, sex will likely be as satisfying, if not more, as it was before your baby came along.
2 comments:
wahh...very the very intersting topic...something than women should know and understand ...thanks sity
ahhahahah... aku blasah je tu :P think that we need to share sometimes...
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